Guest Blogger: Yaya
Today’s Guest Blog entry comes from Yaya, a young lady that I consider to be a sister from another mother. I had been hounding her for a few weeks for a guest entry and she delivered. She’s very funny and intelligent. Wise beyond her years. This is entitled: Strong Men Are Hard To Come By
I write this not for myself, but for all the strong women out there, because even strong women are susceptible to boughts of confusion.
Sooooo, like I said…finding a strong man is like finding a perfect pair of jeans. They either fit you well or they don’t fit you at all. They either last forever or last a few wears. They either feel good to the touch or chaffe the skin. It’s either one or the other. Screw potential. That’s just a disaster waiting to happen – bend over too fast and you’re likely to split your crotch at the seams!
When it comes to men & relationships (in my humble opinion), it’s either black or white. Grey isn’t a color. It’s just some dreary in-between colour because some dumb fuck forgot to clean his paint brush. For all the confusion, frustration & heartache that relationships are comprised of, I can say one thing for certain: Falling in love is easy…Staying in love is a COMPLETELY different matter.
See, that’s where the strength comes in. A strong man is what every strong woman needs. Screw the kindness, romance, thoughtfulness, respect elements because those are a given. But strength encompasses so much more. It includes all these things & most importantly, it involves an incorrigible sense of loyalty & profound faith in someone.
With strength comes security. With strength comes that vital sense of balance between independence & dependence. With strength comes that freedom of ‘being’ wherein your sense of ‘Me’ remains an unexploitable commodity. With strength comes that unfathomable sense of wonder & awe that you are in the company of the most magical person you’ve ever encountered.
Strength. That’s what it comes down to! Isn’t it strange how something so valuable is so hard to find? Diamond in-the-rough, man. But then again, who wants to dig through all that dirt for just a bit of shine? It’d be so much easier if you could spot the gem from a mile away. Well, too bad – it doesn’t work that way.
Strength in a man is just one of those ‘things’ that you have to wait around for – total Chia Pet moment. It’s an investment…of time, emotion, & effort. That’s the part that sucks because fact of the matter is, you never know if you’re going to end up with a piece of aluminum or white gold. Most of the time, it’s aluminum or some other kind of cheap alloy. Like fucking tin!
As with any kind of investment, relationships are wrought with uncertainty. The thing is, unlike business investments, it’s usually harder to walk away with a bruised heart than an empty wallet. Unless, like I always say, you’re a fucking capitalist – in which case it would inevitably hurt more because you don’t have a heart to begin with. Okay, focus. Like I was saying, personal investments of this type are a bitch and-a-half to deal with because it can potentially mess with your head & most importantly, it can mess with your soul… & that pain in your chest is unlike any other pain. I know it. You all know it.
I’m a very black & white person. I think I’ve mentioned that already. That being said, you either do it or you don’t. Step up or step down. Make peace or peace out. People aren’t fucking yo-yo’s. So, if you feel like one, do yourself a favor & cut the damn string! If you don’t have scissors, use your teeth. In the spirit of political correctness, women can be JUST as confusing, frustrating & aggravating as their male counterparts… & out of respect for the diversity of sexual orientation – the same things apply to each gender, but multiplied by 2. Unfortunately, I can’t offer much advice in terms of deterrence. Sorry, but 30 years later & I’m still trying to figure out this whole girl-boy thing myself.
My personal mantra? Ladies, I introduce to you the theory of ’supply & demand’… Know your worth & demand your price! You’re bound to profit because there’s only one of you.